It is days like these that I wonder why I have chosen to live the way I do.
I learned today that my Zambian sister Sandra is getting married this month.
I’m so excited for her! She is an amazing woman, a wonderful mother, an extremely hard worker, and quite the business woman. Whoever she is marrying is one lucky man. Unfortunately, I won’t be there. I never thought living and working in India would be a bad thing.
It is when I hear news like this that I really wonder why I choose to live the way I do. 8,100 miles away from my American family and 8,400 miles away from my Zambian family. (I looked it up, those are the exact distances.) Thousands of miles from friends who are scattered across the globe. Thousands of miles away from the possibility of bumping into someone I know. Thousands of miles away from a 10 minutes walk to visit a friend. Thousands of miles away from anything to remind me of home. (Whatever that may be for me.) I’m beginning to think and feel like there is really something to the saying:
‘Out of sight, out of mind.’
I miss the little things; being able to chat with my favorite aunt any time I want, cook dinner for my parents, go for a walk without getting completely dirty or being stared at the whole time. And it is on days like this, when I find out that my sister is getting married, that I really wished I had a ‘normal job.’ I would have the time and be able to afford a trip to Zambia and celebrate with my family.
I could care less about grocery stores with 9 versions of one thing, electricity that is on all the time, tap water that won’t make you sick, and whatever other ‘conveniences’ America has to offer. That seems to overwhelm me most of the time.
But I guess, for some strange, crazy, insane reason, it is all worth it. I’m having fun.